8 Self-Care Tips For A Better You
‘Self-care’ is one of those terms that are bandied about all over social media these days. We have all seen & equated self-care with those chick flicks where the girl sips on some wine in a bathtub full of roses with some form of face mask on, nine times out of ten 😛
In this blog, I want to debunk some of these culturally appropriated myths & discuss other facets of self-care, pertaining to mental health, general wellness and quality of life.
Myth #1
Self-care is for girls or women only.
Fact: Self-care is for EVERYONE.
Myth #2
Self-care = selfishness.
Fact: Self-care is about prioritizing your health and wellness, while of course, not posing any threat to others!
On a side note, who else here loves Schitt’s Creek? 😃
I believe self-care is about intentionally cultivating your inner joy and peace, which is not dependent on external agents. When you take care of yourself, you become a better version of you — empowered with a healthy mind, you are in a better place to share your happiness with others!
And this applies to everyone- men, women & children… It definitely isn’t limited to just skincare or a day at the spa.
I have discussed plenty of self-care tips in one of my previous blogs- decluttering, reading, meditating, volunteering etc. This blog will cover a few more tips, mostly pertaining to mental health and wellness, hope you like this read. Fair warning, I may or may not have had a tiny case of Friends hangover after watching the Reunion special!
1. Setting Boundaries
We have all been in relationships or equations at home or in the workplace, where our boundaries have been unclear or non-existent.
When this happens, expectations usually run high, and we may become drained out, too soon.
Take stock of your relationships and see what isn’t working for you — be clear on what behavior is acceptable and what isn’t, do the self-work necessary to improve the situation, but be sure to meet them halfway — you don’t want to be the one doing all the heavy lifting.
Walk away from toxic environments that no longer push you to be your authentic self. Practice standing up for yourself, because nobody else can do it, but you.
2. Being Kind to Yourself
Ever felt like your mind is a train running at breakneck speed with far too many frantic passengers (read: thoughts) skipping through it?
Sometimes, we set ourselves up for failure, by raising the bar too high.
Cut yourself some slack — there has been no earth-shattering evidence yet that an incomplete to-do list spells doom 😂 We have all bought into the pop culture lingo of ‘making each day count’. Equally important, is taking time out to recharge yourself — this could mean having a day to yourself when you can unwind and free your mind of all mundane tasks — at least for a little while!
Go on, take a day off and re-watch your favorite Friends episode, I know you want to 😉
3. Saying No
Just a few months earlier, I would have had a hard time saying this simple, harmless little word, ‘No’. This habit of mine has had me in a scrape, on more than one occasion.
Experience being the best teacher there is, I began practicing saying this word when necessary.
Here’s the hard fact-
You decide how people treat you — if you cannot say ‘No’ when necessary, you are essentially lowering your own standards and inviting negative energy into your life.
Better late than never, in this case. Learn to identify your own thought patterns that may be counter-productive; practice new ways of looking at & solving problems — it’s a journey and the most important thing is to start!
Of late, I have been reading about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) which addresses this issue. This article is a helpful starting point for those interested to learn more.
4. Going Offline
Ever found yourself opening up an app, watching a random video it suggests, and then the next one, and before you know it — the whole evening has passed and you’re in too deep in the ‘rabbit hole’ of in-app video recommendations?
Well if it’s any consolation, you’re not the only one. This New York Times column discusses the rabbit hole effect of technology and how we are buying into more screen and app time than ever before.
Think about it — does switching between different apps on your phone fill you up or empty you? Let’s be mindful of what we consume — this includes the videos we watch, the apps we install, the content we engage with, the list goes on… Unsubscribe from unwanted or irrelevant pages and spend more time offline.
Recently, I reduced my TV hours and decided to spend more time away from my phone — I discovered a few passion projects that fill me up, writing this blog is just one of them!
Discover what makes you feel alive, and let it consume you. Don’t do it for the ‘likes’, ‘comments’ or ‘shares’. Do it for you.
5. Honing Creativity, Fueling Passion
There are some really interesting courses and training sessions on Skillshare & Mindvalley. Not all of them are paid, either.
There is nothing more fulfilling than upskilling yourself, or making time for personal development.
Activate those areas of your brain that fuel creativity, intuition and problem-solving. Pick up an old hobby, create something with your hands — don’t be cumbered by the results, just start. For some of us, fear of imperfection or failure may hinder us from even starting a project. In these cases, “Done is better than perfect.”
When I first started writing again, a fellow writer gave me some sage advice — He told me to write daily, write for myself and not for the response or validation… I think this is the best way to master any art.
Today, writing is most definitely therapeutic for me, and the response? That’s a pleasant bonus that keeps me going :)
6. Getting Social
For those of us in India, the pandemic’s second wave is upon us, and the way we connect with people has changed irrevocably.
Miss somebody? Call them. Love someone? Hug them.
(If you live with them, that is. Virtual hugs to those you love and haven't seen in a while!)
Laugh often — laughter has been proven to reduce stress hormones and improve your resistance to disease. Laughter releases the body’s feel-good chemicals known as endorphins. Endorphins can improve your overall wellness & quality of life, and even temporarily relieve pain in some cases.
Little things like hugging or holding hands releases the body’s other well-known feel-good hormone, oxytocin. Higher levels of oxytocin has proven to promote better sleep, lesser stress and a healthier heart.
During this second lockdown, I began connecting with some of my old friends. I was pleasantly surprised to find out that one of my childhood friends now happens to stay quite close to me! Funnier still, is reliving old memories which you don’t even recall, but they can go on about 😂
Sometimes, our childhood friends who know us from way back when — hold the key to a part of us that we had forgotten the existence of!
It’s a wonder what a fresh pair of eyes or ears can do for you. This article on the Johari Window describes this in good detail.
Surround yourself with people who care about you and are a reflection of who you want to be.
7. Get Moving
Walk, groove to some music, work out in an open space — get your heart pumping 💓
Take 30 mins off from your daily routine to focus on some form of cardio exercise- it has been proven to improve cardiovascular health & breathing quality.
What’s more, exercise also helps activate your brain’s reward system, releasing the dopamine hormone, and putting you in a good mood instantly!
While at your work desk, make sure to get up every hour and have a short walk — maybe, fill up your water bottle. This way, you will get moving while staying hydrated!
During a lull time in virtual meetings, lift small dumbbells, get in a few stretches or practice deep breathing — make sure your camera’s off though 🤪
If you’re looking to groove to something post work hours, here’s a little number I just discovered and can’t get out of my head. Thank me later!
8. Nature Time
How do you picture ‘happiness’?
Happiness to me, is a bright sunny day, filled with hope, light and lots of positive vibes. It is somewhere outdoors, for sure.
The one thing that we all miss during this pandemic is the amount of time we used to spend outdoors. Make the most of your natural surroundings — if you’re under lockdown like me, make sure you get some natural light, spend some time in the terrace or balcony and soak up some Vitamin D.
Summing Up…
Let’s manifest vibrancy, light and positive vibes by working on ourselves.
Let’s spread happiness and hope, not hate and anger.
Most of all, let our thoughts, words and actions be in alignment, and reflective of peace, inner growth and transformation.
I want to share a few quotes on self-care and self-compassion below —
“Be who you are and say how you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”
— Dr. Seuss
“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.”
— Oscar Wilde
“The challenge is not to be perfect — it is to be whole.”
— Jane Fonda
“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.”
— Jack Kornfield
“Self-care is giving the world the best of you, instead of what’s left of you.”
— Katie Reed
I hope you enjoyed reading this blog as much I did, writing it!
I also recently began a Food Blog along with my sister on Instagram. We post regularly on our food experiments at home, we’d love to see you there 👋
